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Holding Hands

Workshop Flier

Crafting Quality Relationships​

  • Learn how to make all your relationships work!

  • Refuse to allow conflict to dictate your feelings for each other!

  • Learn skills that will succeed with your lover, kids, friends!

  • Everyone can learn how to relate successfully.

  • No one taught us how to hold a relationship together. So learn how now!

  • Learn how to make relationships work!

  • Refuse to allow conflict to dictate your feelings for each other!

  • Learn skills that will succeed with your mate and kids but will also teach your kids how to relate!

  • No one taught us how to hold a relationship together. So learn now!

What can I expect from this course?

That most people struggle in relationship for similar reasons but that it’s possible to escape these.

  1. To learn those skills that will keep you talking and listening easily to each other without getting reactive.

  2. To put a stop to feeling like you’re on egg shells with your partner, and instead become relaxed and at ease by understanding each other.

  3. To escape your old reactive pattern, come to understand it, and instead develop cool, calm and engaging responses.

  4. To recognize the mechanics of power plays, and learn strategies for escaping them for good.

  5. To talk so that you’ll be heard, and hear others so they will listen to you.

  6. To put a stop to right versus right arguments so that you both get heard and viewpoints valued.

  7. To get your needs and wants successfully understood by your partner.

  8. To feel the love, caring and ease return to your relationship.

  9. To raise your own well-being & happiness, and assist your partner to do the same.

  10. To restore magic to your relationship by being proactively loving and connecting in ways that are known to work.

Your facilitator 

Jeff Saunders has been a counsellor, communications & personal development educator for over thirty years. He has taught in Christchurch at the University of Canterbury College of Education, and trained counsellors at Vision College. He has taught trainee teachers, practicing teachers, and counselling students. In addition he has offered personal and professional development courses to the public and corporates for over thirty years.
A counsellor, individual and couples therapist, and life coach in private practice, he specializes in supporting those who are motivated to put in serious work to enhancing the quality of their lives. His book The Successful Couples Recipe Book used on this course, and his earlier book The 12 Choices of Winners, are a product of years of teaching, counselling, counsellor training, and a personal journey of spiritual development.

Course Summary 2019

Session 1:
Using your Attachment Style to understand each other
Book: Chapters 17 to 20.
Learning about attachment styles, why they occur, how they play out, and the impact these unseen relating styles have on our interactive dynamics. Discover how they operate invisibly but catastrophically.

Session 2:
Understanding self and using this to connect and communicate better
Book: Chapters 17 to 20 as before.
Understanding the sources of our reactivity and conflict management patterns. Emphasis on understanding attachment styles, childhood programming, and the impact of trauma.


Session 3:
Attachment Style help to avoid conflict and feel closer
Book: Chapters 17 to 23, (Part 2, chapters 9 to 12)
The invisible differences in attachment styles (especially) is what leads to conflict. However, each couple has a unique conflict pattern which must first be fully understood after which time it can be dismantled.


Session 4:
Once you understand why you get reactive, you can learn a different way
Book: chapters 9 to 11.
Learning to become an expert with regard to your own attachment style, and appreciating how different your partner’s style is likely to be. Comparing how you function with others who are similar to you.


Session 5: Listening Skills
Listening and expressive skills you never knew were possible!
Book: Chapter 28, 29
In general, most people have poor listening skills, and these deteriorate further when their buttons are pushed. In order for successful relating to be possible, better listening will be required. Quality listening entails a great deal more than most people realise.


Session 6:
Changing beliefs and programming that no longer serve you frees up your connection ability
Book: Part 2, Chapters 9 to 12, Appendix A pages 237, 8.
The second big triggering pattern to dictate relationship behaviour comes from childhood programming. This tends to get us to behave reactively and robotically in ways we may even dislike seeing in ourselves. Identifying this reactive pattern and working with the emotions that drive it is essential.

June 12th and 26th

Starts at 10 am Ends 5:30 pm

Mary Potter Community Centre, 442 Durham Street North, St Albans.





Per Person

Early Bird when payment is received by Tuesday 9th June.

$420 if paid on or after 9th June. Registrations close Thursday 11th.

Cost includes morning & afternoon teas, PowerPoint handouts.
Please bring a shared lunch.

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